I am okay

I am kinda suprised that I am okay. I though that break up would destroy me for a while but no. Of course I have cried and I have been sad but I continue my life. Maybe I am really gotten stronger. Maybe I feel okay because I know I tried my best.  Moving out from home helped me a lot with break up too.

I have lived a week alone now. Of course it’s boring and lonely sometimes but mostly awesome. I can do what I want. I can watch tv at 3am. I have been taking good care of myself. I am waiting my home to be ready so I can celebrate with friends and family.

I want to spend more time with my friends. I want to actually do something with them. And that is kinda new to me.

But now I have to go. ;-;

Love from Alex <3

FUTURE??

What I want to do when I’m older? I probably want to work as a chef at least few years. I have only 1,5 years school left and then I graduate and I can call myself a chef.

I want to live alone for a while just to try do I really want it and I want to see that I survive alone. I want to write as much as I can because it’s quiet and my environment is calm. I want to drink hot cocoa and just write.

I want to make myself a good home where I am safe and I can rest in peace. I want to make people feel good and happy there. I want to make small parties and fun with important people.

And if we think about my future in 5 years.. I probably want to live with my girlfriend then (sooner than that is fine too). I am still working of course. Maybe some kind of a pet or two.  I WANT TO SPEND CHRISTMAS WITH MY GIRLFRIEND! AND HOPEFULLY SOME DAY I CAN CALL HER MY WIFE. I don’t know about yet kid(s).

I REALLY WANT TO WRITE A POEM BOOK AND I KEEP WRITING MY WHOLE LIFE FOR THAT AND FOR MYSELF!!  I want people to read my poems and make them feel less alone. And at the same time I help myself. It’s cool.

I want to travel as much as I can with my girlfriend and probably with friends too. I’m not sure do I want to travel much alone. I want to see more Finland and other countries too.

Lähetäänkö jo??

Mulla tekis hirveenä mieli lähtä matkustamaan jonnekin jonkun kanssa. Ihan vain Suomessa. Ois tosi jees.

Se ois uutta ja mielenkiinnosta. Eniten haluaisin lähtä tyttöystävän kans johonkin.

Mentäis yhessä junalla jonnekki. Se olis  jo tosi mahtavaa.

Haluaisin käydä kävelyllä sen kans jossain nätissä paikassa.

Se ois kivaa.

Ehkä jossain vaiheessa.

Kunhan ensin ilmat lämpenee nii sit mukavampi ehkä lähtä.

Mentäis molemmille ihan uuteen paikkaan.

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Kuva on Raahesta. Kävin siellä perheen kanssa viime kesänä rannalla. Isot kivet ja meri. Tunsin oloni vapaaksi ja kevyeksi.